Saturday, 27 October 2007

Shiver me timbers, hand me that scarf!

Last seen attempting to revive his suit, our more astute readers may have noticed Alien Wally's lack of further contributions. In order to ensure that the macnoodle blog maintains its high standards of balanced commentary and unbiased reporting, he returns now to offer a completely unbiased review of his new scarf, knitted coincidentally by Mags.

When reviewing scarves, it is important to highlight the key aspects that any quality scarf worth its wool should include. Firstly, pattern. A classic pattern with versatile colours ensures your scarf will survive this world of fickle fashion. Nothing like a splash of colour to cheer up the long winter nights of Edinburgh!

Alien Wally gives his dual-tone striped pattern a fickle-free 5/5.

Patterns are important only as far as they go, which is often not far enough. Quality scarves require a good length in order to allow the wearer to adopt a variety of styles, such as
The Traditional Look:

The European Look

The Winter In Edinburgh Look

Alien Wally rates his scarf's styling abilities a lengthy 'leven out of ten.

Most importantly however, a scarf of true quality includes a hidden insignia. Let's view that scarf from a different angle. Now you see it:

Now you don't:

Now you see it:

Alien Wally rates his scarf a skullduggerous six out of five.

If his maths is correct, this means Mags has created a scarf scoring 22/20 in Alien Wally's scarf review, a haarty score which shall now need to be celebrated with a yo ho ho and a bottle-or-two of rum.

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